Just having a calm conversation with Amber (No tweaking) | David Hauser
1:47
Just having a calm conversation with Amber (No tweaking) | David …
48.6K views7 months ago
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system update: amber is currently recharging in front of the radiation box. 📉 sometimes the software glitches and you end up cooking fruit at 2am. i just document the reality. "whatcha cookin? WATERMELON." #HauserInfo #GlitchInTheMatrix #Amber #ResetYourRouter #KitchenNightmares | David Hauser
0:08
system update: amber is currently recharging in front of the radiatio…
15.7K views6 months ago
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Wood Rat House | David Hauser
2:43
Wood Rat House | David Hauser
12.8K views7 months ago
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YOU NEED JESUS! (And maybe some Blue Cheese) 🧀🙏 She is acting a FOOL today! 📉 The "Chinese Man" gave her noodles, and she gave me a headache. 😂 She's throwing pillows, stools, and accusations! Apparently, the noodles are "doodoo" and I'm stealing her shots? 🤷‍♂️ I'm just trying to keep the peace while she tears the room apart. Thank God for the noodles... and thank God for patience! 🙏😤 #YouNeedJesus #Amber #ActingAFool #NoodleDrama #BlueCheese #RealLife #Chaos | David Hauser
2:47
YOU NEED JESUS! (And maybe some Blue Cheese) 🧀🙏 She is acting …
63.1K views6 months ago
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SYSTEM UPDATE: AMBER IS ONLINE ✅ SOUP CHECK: THE PRISON RUMORS WERE A GLITCH. 📉 I conducted a formal interrogation. Q: "Did you go to jail?" A: "NO." The $40k wardrobe is safe. The production continues. Reset your routers and stop inventing stories. #HauserInfo #Glitch #Matrix #Interview #RealityCheck #Chaos | David Hauser
0:15
SYSTEM UPDATE: AMBER IS ONLINE ✅ SOUP CHECK: THE PR…
19.9K views6 months ago
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Analysis: The Assistant Manager has officially crashed outside Mayimmazella's. The headset is still scanning for orders, but the operator is buffering on a loop. That ketchup stain is a badge of honor from a high-velocity condiment explosion. He is currently negotiating a raise with the pavement. 🍟🥴 #HauserInfo #SpicyWater #SpicyWaterArchitects #GravityCheck #SystemFailure #GlitchInTheMatrix #FunnyReels #NightShift #161MPH #ConductiveGas | David Hauser
0:35
Analysis: The Assistant Manager has officially crashed outside May…
1.7K views4 months ago
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JANUARY 12TH FREQUENCY 📡 Caption: Real talk, Amber is over here doing a presidential audit while her new man is catching a contact high. He asked me to calm her down, but I’m just documenting the Syfy Reality. If you can't handle the 161mph vibrations, stay off the tarmac. She’s just scanning the room for the Chinese Man. Imagine thinking you can control a hurricane with a bowl cut. #PresidentialAudit #SyfyReality #HauserInfo #161mph #ConductiveGas #AmberAlert #MatrixGlitch #NewbornNews #HighVo
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JANUARY 12TH FREQUENCY 📡 Caption: Real talk, Amber is over …
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